Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
27 Drunk People That Pissed Off The Cops And Got What They Deserved
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
These 25 Soulless Industries Have Been Scamming Us For Years
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD