an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
23 Adults Confess The Irrational Fears They Had When They Were Kids
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
These 25 Women First Experienced Sexual Harassment At A Shocking Age
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
How does one acquire holy water?
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome