winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando