he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
All the doctor said was why
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
