Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (785): View more from Kansas

  Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.

  (785): View more from Kansas

  I could make treat bags

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (785): Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson. (785): I could make treat bags http://tfl.nu/dekx
  Replies (104) Good night (6115) Bad night (636)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  I'm so horny

  (913): View more from Kansas

  I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (816): I'm so horny (913): I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect http://tfl.nu/ggyh
  Replies (12) Good night (5660) Bad night (1073)
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (440): He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am. http://tfl.nu/6rv7
  Replies (13) Good night (4058) Bad night (696) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (770): View more from Georgia

  I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (770): I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out. http://tfl.nu/bqmt
  Replies (8) Good night (1984) Bad night (1311) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (770): View more from Georgia

  his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (770): his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me.... http://tfl.nu/rsl7
  Replies (32) Good night (1350) Bad night (3111) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (412): there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty" http://tfl.nu/qrhn
  Replies (18) Good night (6366) Bad night (886) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (231): View more from Michigan

  using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (231): using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper. http://tfl.nu/yfpy
  Replies (8) Good night (658) Bad night (1984) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it. http://tfl.nu/tp8b
  Replies (6) Good night (3786) Bad night (688) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (646): View more from New York

  There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.

  (917): View more from New York City

  Delicious

  (646): View more from New York

  I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (646): There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table. (917): Delicious (646): I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt. http://tfl.nu/gs74
  Replies (5) Good night (1144) Bad night (1070)
• Favorite

  (216): View more from Ohio

  Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (216): Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself. http://tfl.nu/3gaw
  Replies (46) Good night (2209) Bad night (636) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (519): Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar? http://tfl.nu/o2qi
  Replies (20) Good night (1668) Bad night (420) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (609): The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit. http://tfl.nu/al9k
  Replies (6) Good night (372) Bad night (1133) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (870): View more from Arkansas

  I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (870): I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me. http://tfl.nu/h17o
  Replies (12) Good night (1118) Bad night (335)
• Favorite

  (501): View more from Arkansas

  I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (501): I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it. http://tfl.nu/ipd9
  Replies (5) Good night (879) Bad night (412) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (253): View more from Washington

  Pants off. Spirits lifted.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (253): Pants off. Spirits lifted. http://tfl.nu/wzml
  Replies (2) Good night (792) Bad night (177) Order T-Shirt

Randomize