well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
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He uses pillows to masturbate.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
16 People Who Have Raised The Bar For Petty Revenge
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.