god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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