If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize