Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
She just used a chaser for red wine.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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