I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Randomize
