who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
But break dance skills will only take you so far
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
