I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
