between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
