Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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