Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
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I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I got my gum stuck on his balls.