dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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