Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
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