Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
