my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Slut skills are useful in every country.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize