I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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