i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
