i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
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