Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?