Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
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