the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
