it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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