i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
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Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
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I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
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