Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize