you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
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