it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
These 27 People Had No Idea What They Were Doing When It Came To Sex
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.