never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Randomize