'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
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