would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
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