I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
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