I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
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