I only kidnapped one of them. chill
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
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