I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
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Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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