Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
