But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
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He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
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Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
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