Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
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I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
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Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
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