I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
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