Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.