Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize