Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
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