She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
These 21 People Came Up With Hilarious Excuses For Their Hickies
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.