He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
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My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
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THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.