if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
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