He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
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