I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Randomize
