I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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