By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
my poor anus
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
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